Angelfire

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  Angelfire by Courtney Allison Moulton

Own a signed copy.

Summary (from Goodreads): When seventeen-year-old Ellie starts seeing reapers – monstrous creatures who devour humans and send their souls to Hell – she finds herself on the front lines of a supernatural war between archangels and the Fallen and faced with the possible destruction of her soul.

A mysterious boy named Will reveals she is the reincarnation of an ancient warrior, the only one capable of wielding swords of angelfire to fight the reapers, and he is an immortal sworn to protect her in battle. Now that Ellie’s powers have been awakened, a powerful reaper called Bastian has come forward to challenge her. He has employed a fierce assassin to eliminate her – an assassin who has already killed her once.

While balancing her dwindling social life and reaper-hunting duties, she and Will discover Bastian is searching for a dormant creature believed to be a true soul reaper. Bastian plans to use this weapon to ignite the End of Days and to destroy Ellie’s soul, ending her rebirth cycle forever. Now, she must face an army of Bastian’s most frightening reapers, prevent the soul reaper from consuming her soul, and uncover the secrets of her past lives – including truths that may be too frightening to remember.

I don’t know what it was about this book, but I had a hard time with it and honestly still haven’t finished it. First off, I have had a stressful two weeks so maybe my judgment is slightly clouded. Second, I had literally JUST finished City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare and was seeing a few things in Angelfire that reminded me of CoFA, which also threw me off a little.

I felt like the main character, Ellie, asked way to many questions. To the point where I found it annoying. She would ask the same questions, maybe worded differently, but they all seemed to be about the same thing over and over. My book club read this book and the others said that they didn’t notice the questions quite as much as I did. Ellie’s guardian, Will, has to keep reminding her of what she is, and what her purpose is. I think that after the second time he tells you, it should stick a little in your head.

With Ellie asking so many questions, you would think you would get some answers, but I found Will brushing them off by answering with something like, “Irrelevant.” “It will come to you.” “That doesn’t matter.” Clearly the main character is not remembering, so could you help her out? Maybe even a little?

Maybe my stressful two weeks has me nit-picking a little too bad on those points, but the few things that reminded me of CoFA? The main characters in CoFA have black swirling tattoo’s that normal humans can’t see. The MC Will, in Angelfire, has black swirling tattoos that Ellie didn’t notice before her powers were awakened. CoFA mentions a demon named Lilith, and so does Angelfire. After about 184ish pages, I didn’t really want to finish the book. I may pick it up again this summer and give it another shot, but as for now it will sit on my shelf unfinished.

I don’t feel like Ellie grew much as a character either. She just seems to have accepted the fact that she has to kill reapers but she still want’s to live her old normal life as if nothing has changed. And maybe she is a little over sensitive about what her dad thinks. At one point in the book, she goes flying through a window of her house and her dad calls her a moron and she seemed completely heart broken. If I broke a window in my house my dad would call me a moron too! If not with more colorful wording.

For those of you who have read it, finished or not, what did you think?

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Died

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Yep. So my blog seems to have died off here. I need to change that but I seem to be stuck in this funk where I don’t want to do anything. With my dance recital coming up my mind has been stuck on that and how bad I seem to be failing at my dances. Hopefully I will be able to come back here sometime soon though.

*blows kisses and tries to think of some fancy blog posts*

Alabama

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For those of who who have subscribed, or check in from now and then, I’m sorry that I haven’t posted much lately. I have been kind of busy and have a few reviews I should put up. There won’t be anything else this week for I am headed to Alabama to see my cousin Kelly!! ♥ 12 hour car drive here I come!

Just know that I love you all for reading my stuff, and I will be back soon enough.
*blows kisses and drives away*

Tell Me a Secret by Holly Cupala

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Tell Me a Secret by Holly Cupala

★★★★★ 5/5 Stars

(borrowed this book)

Summary (from the publisher): It’s tough living in the shadow of a dead girl…

In the five years since her bad-girl sister Xanda’s death, Miranda Mathison has wondered about the secret her sister took to the grave, and what really happened the night she died. Now, just as Miranda is on the cusp of her dreams—a best friend to unlock her sister’s world, a ticket to art school, and a boyfriend to fly her away from it all—Miranda has a secret all her own.

When two lines on a pregnancy test confirm her worst fears, Miranda is stripped of her former life. She must make a choice with tremendous consequences and finally face her sister’s demons and her own.

In this powerful debut novel, stunning new talent Holly Cupala illuminates the dark struggle of a girl who must let go of her past to find a way into her own future.

Hmm…. Where to start….

I abso-freakin-lutley loved this novel! Holly does a wonderful job at capturing the struggles of a pregnant teen. She slowly unfolds the secrets of the night that Xanda died, and how everyone has a breaking point, no matter how strong they think they are. This book left me staring open mouthed, grumbling at a character, and even in tears at one point. This is a VERY powerful read and I suggest it to….everyone.

Miranda’s so-called “best friend” Delaney was to be frustrating to me. She completely treated Miranda like crap, and even lied to her and spread rumors about her. I would like to think I would have dropped her as a friend, although, I have never been in Miranda’s situation. I did however want to slap her. The mother-daughter relationship in this book is very tense. Her mother already had one daughter who was very rebellious and lost her. She wanted to blame everyone and anything for her daughters death, and seemed to  hope that Miranda would be the perfect daughter in comparison to the very rebellious one. Once she found out about the pregnancy, her hopes had been washed down the drain. She tried to remain control over her daughter by telling her what job she was getting, and where she couldn’t go. Following Miranda through this journey of self-discovery was amazing!

Deb Caletti (author of Honey, Baby, Sweetheart) is quoted on the back of the book stating, “A gripping, emotional story about a young girl with a tragic past and an uncertain future. I dare you to set it down during it’s last hundred pages. I dare you.”

I definitely couldn’t put it down! Near the end I was brought to tears, not many books do that too me. This is definitely one of my favorite books and I WILL be rushing out to get my own copy ASAP!

Other Words for Love by Lorraine Zago Rosenthal

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Other Words for Love by Lorraine Zago Rosenthal

★★★★☆ 4/5 Stars

Summary (from Goodreads): “When an unexpected inheritance enables Ari to transfer to an elite Manhattan prep school, she makes a wealthy new friend, Leigh. Leigh introduces Ari to the glamorous side of New York–and to her gorgeous cousin, Blake. Ari doesn’t think she stands a chance, but amazingly, Blake asks her out. As their romance heats up, they find themselves involved in an intense, consuming relationship. Ari’s family worries that she is losing touch with the important things in life, like family, hard work, and planning for the future.

When misfortune befalls Blake’s family, he pulls away, and Ari’s world drains of color. As she struggles to get over the breakup, Ari must finally ask herself: were their feelings true love . . . or something else?”

I liked this book a lot! Although I found the very beginning a little slow, Lorraine does a fantastic job of writing and it flows really well. I had friends like Summer, always had a boyfriend and some of them seemed more like arm candy than real relationships. I went all of my High School years without a boyfriend, so Ari got me beat there! Ari does get so wrapped up in Blake that she forgets about her other friends. I have felt left out by some of my friends when they get that wrapped up in their boyfriends, but then I am the friend who picks them up, and Ari didn’t seem to have a friend who would do that for her. Not having that friend to pick her up made her struggle with the breakup even more, and forced her to become more dependent on herself when she finally decided it was time to move on.

Ari’s relationship with her mother reminds me a lot of my relationship with my mom. In the sense that it is good, but talking to her about certain things, I just can’t do. I also relate myself to Ari in the sense that I often keep things to myself even if other people tell me to talk about it and to not bottle it up. It was nice to see her open up to someone after months of refusing to.

Ari’s sister Evelyn I can also relate to one of my cousins. She had a child before she was married, and had a rough time for a while. She now has three kids and is working on her second marriage. She is doing a lot better than previous years, as is Evelyn in this story. I loved watching all of these relationships unfold into something better, even through their rough spots. (Clearly I relate character’s in books to people in my personal life a lot.)

I would definitely recommend this book to a lot of teens. Maybe they would see that your first love, while unforgettable, may not be the right one.

My Own Writing

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I am going to actually post a small part of my own writing up this time. This has been posted as comments on another blog so those of you who follow that one, have already these. I am going to splurge and let people I know read this now. Let me know what you think, and you know, if you’ve already read these you are welcome to comment again. This is the middle of a story, and no, you cannot have more…..yet. Maybe this is too much to post on one blog buuttt I feel it’s all necessary. BTW this is FICTION.

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As I squirmed around my bed, I clutched my sides and screamed into my pillow. I was crying so hard I couldn’t breathe. It felt like someone was sitting on my chest just to see how long it took until I passed out. Maybe I could cry out all the anger and pain I felt inside. How could no one realize how emotionally unstable I felt? Gripping my sides didn’t help me breathe any better, but it felt like I could hold myself together and not shatter into a million pieces. Like a broken figurine, glue between the cracks, and a rubber band around it for support while you wait for it to fuse back together. By the time I was all cried out, my hand was bruising and sore. I couldn’t make a fist anymore. My pillow felt as if it had been left out in a rainstorm. I tossed my soggy pillow aside and tried to sleep. I didn’t want to go through with tomorrow because I already knew what was coming. I knew they would play it off like none of it happened. It was in the past now, why look back?

Crying that hard must have exhausted me because I fell asleep somewhere around 4 a.m. Despite being drained of all energy I woke up around seven, very groggy and not wanting to move. I decided that I wanted to message my friend Cory and explain what happened. I usually messaged him because he could calm me down and help me see if I was being irrational in a situation. This time I wasn’t. I explained what happened between me and my parents the night before and he said he was sorry and that he wished he could be of more help. I felt bad always leaning on him, pouring my heart and soul into a tiny message for him to dissect. I felt like I was giving him a window into my life, exposing it for what it really was. Showing him that the smile I paint on for the public wasn’t how I really felt.

Writing out all my dilemmas was a hell of a lot easier than voicing them. Whenever I opened my mouth to spill out my opinions, I felt a lump in my throat choking off my air supply. As if the world didn’t care to hear what I had to say. I sat there messaging Cory for a few hours. I was sitting in the family room pretending to pay attention to my parents conversation. Every now and then I would chime in. They did in fact play it off like nothing happened last night. They were the happy couple that everyone saw when they were in public. To me, it seemed like every other word that slid out of their mouths was poison. Either a little white lie or something bossy and hypocritical. It wasn’t just them. It was everyone. The people I worked for, the people I thought I could trust.

I hated listening to the lies everyone told me. I hated knowing they were lies, but not being able to announce that I knew. It weighed me down trying to act calm in front of everyone, playing it off like I was fine. I wanted to rip my hair out I was so frustrated. My conscience was screaming while my shell stood there and smiled. I excused myself from the table where my parents were arguing, to go take a bath. I ran to my room to grab some clothes and that little black box I liked to keep hidden in the depths of my dresser. I started my bath and carefully set the box on the edge of the tub. “Here we go,” I whispered to myself, and climbed into the warm water. I grabbed the tiny box, and pulled out that small piece of metal that had made me feel so much better before. I stared at it in all of its glory, knowing full well what all of this meant. They would think I was crazy.

I knew I was wrong, but I couldn’t stop. Everyday the same old problems, everyday they never get resolved. I wasn’t doing this to kill myself, I was doing it as a release. Some proof that I wasn’t dead, proof I still had feelings. I felt like this little razor blade might be able to cut through the web of lies and anger that contorted every thought that crossed my twisted mind. Placing it to my mouth wasn’t working anymore. I was having trouble eating and people would notice I had stopped altogether. As I pressed the icy blade to my inner thigh, I clenched my teeth together and began to drag it across my skin.

It stung at first, and my eyes filled with hot tears. When the three parallel lines had been carved, I leaned back in the tub and almost felt relaxed. Both my pain and thoughts subsided into a black hole that filled my mind. I no longer felt the need to finish the bath, I just wanted to stay here forever, not caring, not feeling, not needing anyone or anything.

My dad knocked on the door and announced he needed to go and complained about me taking the longest baths ever. I didn’t want to get out of the tub yet. I wanted to savor this feeling, but I knew he would just continue to complain, so I forced myself to get up and dry off. I pulled on my sweatshirt and wrapped my hair in a towel. I started to pull up my jeans, but they stung at my wounds. I grabbed an ace bandage, wrapped up my thigh, and pulled up my jeans for the second time, and walked out the door.

I made it down the stairs and to my bedroom, but I was feeling a little shaky. There was a little red splotch about the size of a quarter on my thigh. I poked at it wondering if it was from the first time I tried getting dressed or if it was bleeding through the ace bandage. The dot grew a little bigger and I knew. As I switched into sweatpants I peeked at my leg. All three of the freshly carved lines were trickling out the last remnants of my pain. I waited for them to stitch themselves together so I could continue the act of being perfectly fine. I felt like and old rag doll, sewn together where I had grown weak yet permanently smiling despite how worn down I felt.

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That’s it (for now). What do you think? Actually after re-reading this, I don’t like how the first paragraph runs into the second one. It needs to flow better. #IMO

In My Mailbox (3)

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In My Mailbox is an internet meme hosted by The Story Siren. It is a way for book blogger’s to show off what they got throughout the week.

This week I went to the book store and got Cryer’s Cross by Lisa McMann. My Book Club and I just finished reading the Dream Catcher series (Wake, Fade, and Gone) and I am really excited to read Cryer’s Cross!! I had to get it as soon as possible!

I also got Vesper by Jeff Sampson while at the book store. I wanted to read this, but wanted to read it even more after I read the blog post Students Want to Know: Jeff Sampson. It was really to cool to read his answers and get a little more insight on his book than Goodreads gives.


That was all I bought this week, but I did come home to some awesome mail! I got two signed bookmarks from Amy Dominy author of OyMG due out in May. Aren’t they super cute bookmarks?!?!?

That’s all I got this week! What did you get in your mailbox?